In The Course Of Time I Have Learned Not To Beg For Attention And Love

If in a relationship we notice that attention is no longer the same or that a relationship is falling apart, we should have sufficient strength own to distance ourselves and focus on our wellbeing.

Over time, I've learned not to beg for attention and love

In the course of our lives we discover and learn many new things. Also that one should never beg for  attention and honest love, one often has to learn through (negative) experiences.

Love and affection are basic human needs. By attaching ourselves to others, we can mature and grow. We learn to give and receive love. But the  attention and affection should always be sincere.

If the other person turns away and shows no interest, accept this and distance yourself, even if you feel lonely.

Those who beg for attention or affection will hurt themselves and make their suffering worse. If you ignore yourself and feel empty, you quickly fall into deep sadness.

Never lose your dignity, trust your inner strength and never forget what you are worth!

We invite you to reflect on this topic with us in this article.

Only attention not begged is honest

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The need for attention is not negative, nor is it a sign of immaturity. We all want to be valued and respected by others.

  • People need attention, but also self-awareness. Any kind of bond, within the family or in a partnership, is based on the need to be recognized, affirmed and accepted, just as one is.
  • In childhood, healthy alertness has a positive and strengthening effect in order to be able to grow up confidently.
  • In a partnership, mutual attention is a sign of a strong bond.
  • When you love a person, you pay attention to them  because, after all , you want to take care of them and give them the best.

Therefore, attention is essential in any relationship of any kind.

The problem arises, however, when someone who is important to you doesn’t pay you emotional, psychological, and behavioral attention.

The inner child, begging attention, has to mature

During childhood, those children who do not receive sufficient love, appreciation, and affection always seek attention.

  • This often leads to behavioral disorders, which are often expressed through anger, tears, anger, etc.
  • Lack of affection during childhood often creates a  deep inner emptiness in adulthood.

A past with deep emotional gaps, in turn, usually results in very low self-esteem. In this case, many feel the need to fill the emptiness through a relationship.

  • People who beg their partner’s love even though they are aware that they are no longer loved need to regain their emotional strength.
  • Nothing is more destructive than insisting on something that no longer exists and is detrimental to mental and physical health.
  • If you are not loved, you have no chance, you should distance yourself and say goodbye.

How should you behave when you no longer feel loved?

It’s easy to say, ” distance yourself, ” but what exactly can you do in this situation?

  • You can’t just forget or stop a love overnight.
  • An emotional disappointment or a traumatic breakup leaves deep marks.
  • The somatosensory cortex, where the insular cortex is located (this is where the brain’s pain zone is), interprets these situations as traumatic, which is why separation is very difficult.

Steps to Overcome a Breakup

  • The first step is a mature and honest conversation with your life partner.
  • Express your feelings and thoughts, and explain why you think the relationship is not working. 
  • After the breakup, you have to get through the grief phase. This takes an average of 2 months, after which you can accept the situation better and look ahead again.
  • Seek support from family and friends. Stop focusing your thoughts on the past, building new short-term and long-term plans and goals.
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Think about what you are worth as a person every day. Fully focus on yourself, take care of yourself, try mindfulness exercises, and do things that relax and make you happy.

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